Continuations
Who's got some New Year's resolutions? Certainly not this gal.
Continuations instead of Resolutions
According to the Georgian calendar, the planet shifted into a new year recently. Once again, it will be weeks before we get the hang of writing 2024 instead of 2023. If you are in some way connected to people, whether in real life, on social media, or through carrier pigions, it is all but inevitable to come face-to-face with a very peculiar facet of society: the New Year’s Resolution(s).
Initially, as I contemplated what to write about, I wanted to be all smug and expose this tradition as yet another Hallmark or marketing invention. Turns out, the Babylonians, around 4,000 years ago, already had a hankering for making (and, let’s be realistic, probably breaking) resolutions. Plot twist: Now I am intrigued by that history and will end up spending too much time reading up on it.
Still, to the curious observer, particular trends in framing one’s NYR (New Year’s Resolutions; too lazy to type the whole thing every time) emerge every year. These trends might stick around for a while or be one-hit wonders. Setting resolutions has become more ubiquitous and almost compulsory (and more stressful because…comparison?) thanks in large part to social media. These ‘social media rituals’ can be worthwhile to reflect on things that you are grateful for and/or things that you’d like to change. (Health and losing weight are, not surprisingly at all, the #1 NYR most years).
The trend this year: lists of ‘ins & outs’. Often in the forms of short videos (I think they are called ‘reels’ nowadays 🤔) or screenshots of a notes app. People share things, ideas, values, behaviors, etc. that they want to leave behind or embrace more in 2024. My guess is, the rate of achieving these lists is going to be about as high as those of regular NYR. For a lengthier discussion of ‘in & out’ lists, check out this article: The New Year’s Resolution is Dead and…
For 2023, I did not make a resolution, but decided to have a “word of my year”: expansive. I wanted to expand areas of my life that felt like they had become too small due to a global pandemic, while also allowing myself to personally take up more space and express myself more expansively in a number of different ways. Hah, so naive and still struggling to accept my chronic illnesses.
Months ago during the fall, I realized that my start into 2024 would not be paved with good intentions. Instead, I simply continue. Shifting the focus from resolving to do something to continuing feels like a better fit. I am still in the middle of learning valuable and painful lessons and that progress cannot be neatly tucked into the 365 (attention: we have entered a leap year!) days of a calendar year.
An Incomplete List of Continuations
I am going to continue to…
make my health and well-being a priority.
attempt letting people, behavior, things,… go that are detrimental to my priority.
write as much as I can.
share my writing.
pay attention to what & who brings value to my life.
learn more about Long Covid, ME/CFS, chronic illnesses, disabilities, etc.
be frustrated with the medical and health care system.
create a beautiful life of my choosing while trying to accept my set of chronic conditions.
learn: Swedish and, for example, about the history of new year’s resolutions 🤓
spend my energy & time wisely: with supportive family, friends, my cats, in nature.
…
I’d be lying if I wrote that I don’t like telling people what to do, because I really do. So: see if any of this resonates with you. Take what does and leave the rest behind. Your time & energy are too precious to waste on the shoulds in life.
Words that remain
Glimmers
Glimmer: a micro moment of joy, awe, hope, safety; opposite of trigger
Morning walks. Not too long ago, I could not go for walks due to the severity of some symptoms. Now, I love to bundle up for my short walks, especially when it’s properly cold. 😊
An der schönen, blauen Donau… A good night’s sleep. So rare and thus all the more precious when it happens 😴🌙🛌
My cats. Three makes a perfect little family 🥰🐈⬛🐈🥹
Sisters 🩷😻😻😻
A question that remains…
What is your take on New Year’s Resolutions and ‘in & out’ lists? 📋
Hey Yvonne! I also notice these trends in the approach to each new year and what people collectively intend. This year I definitely noticed people on social media posting what they wished to have MORE OF or LESS OF. A way to organize their lists--things to increase; things to avoid. I think most of us have certain things we struggle with, struggles that are likely to accompany us throughout our lives. We have to befriend these things, knowing they travel alongside us. I once asked a therapist when I would be "over" certain problems I had. I felt impatient after being in therapy for a few years, in my mid-thirties, and wanted to know why it wasn't making these problems disappear. The therapist, a very wise woman told me that I would never be cured of these challenges. They were mine. She said you will just learn to manage them better. And over the years, I learned she was right. It was about managing the things I struggle with. Not conquering. All this to say, I like your term "continuance," because it captures more the ongoing nature of our human struggle and strife. It's more realistic. Keep on keeping on. That alone is a huge feat for some people. Also, Yay for more cats in the house, and morning walks! Love, Melanie